Evolve The Relationship With Yourself

Find ways to protect your energy and learn to live truly free.

We all hear the term "self-love," but what does it truly mean? I'd say my personal definition of self-love is embracing yourself fully and truly. Although we do have insecurities, I mean we're all human; it's bound to happen. But you cannot let it consume you; accept it and keep moving forward.

Over the years, through my journey of self-discovery and self-love, rebuilding the relationship I have with myself, I thought I'd share two of the most important things I've learned.

Adorning yourself

This is something I only recently began to do this past month, but I've begun to notice it starts the day with something positive.

When you get up in the morning and as you begin to get ready, recognize that this is a time to begin your day with positive energy. Light an incense; I buy mine from my local crystal shops, Holistic House or Mystical Expressions. Then, as you're doing your makeup or skincare, you can recite some affirmations depending on what you need more of in life; that can be anything from career-based to love-based.

Depending on what I'm wearing, I'll place a crystal in my pocket, purse, or even headscarf. Rose Quartz and Jade are all-time favorites of mine, bringing love and luck. You can add a bit of adornment oil to it; I use Manifestation oil. But the jewelry and crystals I adorn myself with tend to bring a sense of peace and energy to my day.

Treating Yourself Better

Treating yourself better, I would say, is a game changer. It's something I've noticed a lot of people lack. But treating yourself with more care and truly listening to your needs unlocks the door to self-love.

It can start off as something small: getting something you've always wanted but thought you were 'too old' for or 'undeserving' of. (Unless it's way out of your budget, of course! Please don't let me cause you a financial disaster.)

For example, I really wanted a new piercing, but I'd talk myself out of it for so long. But one day I said screw it and went into the piercing shop and got it done. Because I let go of this strange idea that I wasn't "cool enough" to get it, and replaced it with "who cares, I want it!"

As you treat yourself better, you begin to notice really neat things about yourself. Things that stick out to people but to you are just normal. I one day realized that I'm really cool, but I never realized because to me it was just normal. Human beings are very complex creatures with a vast amount of interest; big or small, we all have something in common. And as we begin to realize how we can be more introspective in our everyday lives, we start to appreciate our own unique traits and interests.

Live for Yourself

Living for yourself is something that every person on this earth must do. Now you can choose your life, but you have to live it. I cannot count how many times I've been told by family members what kind of job I should have. But my mother told me something that I really took to heart: "Never get into a career that you know you'll hate just because the money is good." That has to go for everything in life, to be honest. A lot of people in life that I've seen would rather see others safe and miserable than taking a risk and being happy with the outcome. Anything in life can fail, but you can never know until you do it.

This can go for simple everyday things too, such as buying items simply for the trend. Expanding on this, I'm a very fashionable person; I love getting dressed up. I've been asked many times what I would wear that others consider to be in season. All I can say is, "whatever feels and looks good on me."

I spend a very minimal amount of time following trends, though that's not to say I avoid them completely. I will always have my Stanley mug and Juicy Couture bag on me!

But the key is to stop buying clothes just to fit in. Instead, buy clothes that suit your interests and what you genuinely like. More often than not, people appreciate something a little different!

Ultimately, living for yourself is a beautiful mixture of all three of these points. Once you begin to evolve your relationship with yourself, you will naturally evolve your relationships with others. Deepen the love within yourself first, so you can later express it with the rest of the world.